Admit it, we’ve all been there. We’ve been so broke that we didn’t even have the money to buy basic necessities. Let me, a student living abroad, be your master and teach you how to be broke in ten easy ways. Yeah, I am cool that way!
1) Why go through the khuwari of cooking at home when you are rich tonight? Let’s just dine outside. LET’S!
I’m not cutting the onions, I feel lazy today. I never bought groceries before, I’ll manage dining outside this month too.
2) Better yet, let’s take a friend along and pay for him as well.
Because you don’t want to be alone and Sachi Yaari Sab pe Bhari.
3) Buy unnecessary things. They might be needed someday, might as well buy them today.
Me: Let’s buy this new pair of headphones.
Also me: But I already have two extra pairs of headphones.
Also also me: You might need them someday when all of your headphones don’t work.
4) I need new clothes. I had to repeat my clothes twice last month.
I wore the same clothes on the 1st of March and the 22nd. I can’t live like that.
5) It’s been ages since I partied, let me show the chicks how rich I am.
Buys entry tickets, not the ordinary ones, apna sarkari style VIP.
6) Drinks on me. (HARAM)
I repeat HARAM.
Never knew when shoes became my weakness, but they just did.
8) Snacks, because cheeji meejian is life.
Who can resist that Galaxy bar slowly melting in their mouths or Doritos dipped in cheese? Shit, I’m hungry again.
9) Let’s meet up for coffee. Too late, it’s almost dinner. Let’s have dinner and I’m paying because MARDANGI!
How badly will the girl sitting next to me or society as a whole judge me if I don’t pay for the lady I’m accompanying? Will the society accept me?
10) Class at 8.30 am? Woke up at 7.30 am? Why walk to class, let’s just take a cab and sleep 45 precious minutes.
Like who really wants to wake up that early? The universities should ban early morning classes. I mean how could you actually have teachers wake up so early.
Everyone studying abroad experiences stuff like this and being broke is really bad. You learn survival tactics that you would never have learnt on Baap ka Paisa. You learn to manage all expenses from bills to rent to tuition fee and FOOD. Sometimes though it’s fun how much you can do without a single penny.
Written by Shaharyar Shahzad
The writer is also a vocalist, guitarist and an amateur drummer with a knack for writing. He has been living and studying in Cyprus for the past three years.